Our children should and deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, recognizing their autonomy and validating their experiences and feelings.
Françoise Dolto (1908-1988), a renowned French psychoanalyst, dedicated much of her career to studying and understanding children. In her work, she tried to show several innovative and profound ideas about childhood, the relationship between children and adults and children’s psychic development:
• Children are complete individuals from birth, with their own emotions, desires and ways of understanding the world with a rich and complex psychic life;
• Language is fundamental to a child’s development. Even before they acquire speech, children are able to understand and be affected by the language of the adults around them. Speaking to children clearly and truthfully, respecting their ability to understand, is essential for the development of healthy adolescents;
• Just like adults, children have an unconscious mind that influences their behaviors and emotions. Therapeutic work with children must take these important unconscious aspects into account;
• Children’s symptoms and behaviors (such as illnesses, behavioral disorders, etc.) are actually forms of communication, ways in which young children express their internal conflicts and emotions that cannot be expressed verbally. The child’s body speaks!
• The mental health of the child (future adult) suffers a profound and lasting impact depending on the relationship with the parents and/or caregivers;
With adequate support and a safe and understanding environment, children have a remarkable ability to overcome trauma and difficulties as they have great resilience.
